But I recently purchased a soapbox.
I don’t know where to begin. I feel like there should be some precursor but all I really have are the ground rules. It’s my unhumble opinion they are the unwritten guidelines for basic humanity as well as the Happy Universe, and maybe that’s what I’ll call them from now on. It’s a rather spectacular Life free of most of the things that can hurt you. And here is exactly how to find it:
1. Be as honest as you can be with yourself about everything.
2. Be as honest as you can with everyone around you.
Lies are a game of pretend that doesn’t end. There is no big Lie or small Lie, dishonesty is a suicide attempt on your morality and your life and is as good as attempted murder of another’s soul if you Lie to them. Or yourself. If you have told a Lie then you have felt the Guilt, which is the equivalent of the Universe strapping a boot to your tire and keeping you on the curb for all the world to see, for all the world to randomly lean on you and for all the birds to shit on.
3. Shed the negative speak.
Participating in negative speak about anything is like swimming in quicksand. For a second, it is a novel feeling. “Omg, I can’t believe I’m in quicksand! I can’t wait to tell the folks back home! I can’t wait to blog about my quicksand moment! This actually feels kind of cool! QUICKSAND! CAN YOU EVEN BELIEVE IT?!”
Then, of course, you’re sucked in far enough and you die. This is a metaphor.
And in my unhumble opinion negative speak equates gossip, judgement, long elaborate discussions on the Denial train, and it can be from cell phone to cell phone about a friend, instant message conversations about last night, or too much indulgence of stalking a celebrity rehab trainwreck on network television. No matter how close or involved or not involved, it sets the tone for a way of thinking and speaking that always leads to an acceptance of negative speak which will breed like nasty cockroaches and take over your house and your head and your heart and before you know it you’re a big ole pile of nuclear cockroaches and, “OMG I TOTALLY CAN’T BELIEVE I’M SURROUNDED IN COCKROACHES AND SINKING IN QUICKSAND!”
And that’s it.
Don’t lie and don’t talk about the Unnecessary. “Unnecessary” is really what negative speech is to me. Unnecessary speech. Wastes of breath that do more harm than good. Being conscious about these things will lead to realizing our species is practically addicted to the Unnecessary idea, and shedding that addiction is like losing 100 pounds in a week.
I’ve always been rather protective of myself and now that I’ve bred and found my “life partner” I’m protective of them too. Which means, I will slay any negative speech, useless speech or lies, regardless of their context or where they’re coming from or what they’re about or who they involve or what kind of electronic device they are delivered on as vehemently as I would shoot a tiger in the head if it wanted my family for lunch.
Because I fight for the things I love and I fight for truth and happiness and as full of cheese as that sounds, it doesn’t take away the Fact that it is Reality and if you don’t believe me, then you haven’t found happiness yet. Can I get an “Amen.”
It was over a decade ago that I shed that 100 pounds and lived completely in the Happy Universe where I attracted good things, good ideas, good people, good relationships and where Happiness and Contentment were not something I was hoping I would be, rather it was something that I actually was. In a tangible sort of way. Go ahead, hold my hand. It’s happy. You can feel it.
No, I didn’t read a book and no I’m not immune to the pitfalls and tragedies of the world. The difference is, I’m not afraid of the pitfalls. At all. I know that my side wins.
And as a warning, I’m going to keep my soapbox around for a while right now and I’m going to keep my gun really close because I see Tigers lurking in the forest and I’m not afraid to shoot them. Keep your distance. This is not a metaphor.
Damnitall 